A real friend is someone who walks in when the rest of the world walks out - Proverb

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of - Burt Bacharac

After the game, the king and the pawn go into the same box - Italian Proverb

Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don't mind, age don't matter - Satchel Paige

Ah, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a heaven for? - Robert Browning

An old friend will help you move. A good friend will help you move a dead body - Jim Hayes

Anger is momentary madness - Annon

Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new - Albert Einstein

Behind every successful man, there's a woman. Behind every unsuccessful man, there are two - Annon

Believing everybody is dangerous; believing nobody is very dangerous - Abraham Lincoln

Bullshit can get you to the top but it won't keep you there - Annon

Business, you know, may bring money, but friendship hardly ever does - Jane Austen

Choose your friends carefully. Your enemies will choose you - Yasser Arafat

Don't compare yourself to anyone in this world. If you do, you're insulting yourself - Alen Strike

Every man should marry. Afterall, happiness is not the only thing in life - Annon

Everyone thinks of changing the world but nobody thinks of changing himself - Leo Tolstoy

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer - Ed Cunningham

Goals are the fuel in the furnace of achievement - Brian Tracy, Eat that Frog 

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take the risk - Annon

How come "abbreviated" is such a long word? - Annon

I can resist everything except temptation - Oscar Wilde

I cannot teach anybody anything; I can only make them think - Socrates

I either Get what I want or I change my mind - Dreams For An Insomniac

I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses
had run them through the US Congress - Ronald Reagan

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me - Fred Allen

I was born intelligent - education ruined me - Annon

I will not say I failed 1,000 times, I will say there are 1,000 ways that can cause failure - Thomas Edison  

If it is true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for? - Annon 

If someone feels that they had never made a mistake in their lives; then it means they had never tried a new thing in the life - Einstein

If we cannot love the people we see, how can we love God who we cannot see? - Mother Teresa

If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten - George Carling

If you can't convince them, confuse them - Harry S. Truman

If you don't know where you are going, you'll end up someplace else - Yogi Berra

If you start judging people, you will find no time to love them - Mother Teresa

If you think life is bad, try being an egg... You only get laid once... You only get eaten once... It takes four minutes to get hard and only two to get soft... You share a box with 6 other guys... Worst of all, the only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother - Unknown
  
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments - Flip Wilson

If you win, you need not explain but if you lose, you should not be there to explain - Adolph Hitler

If your father is a poor man, it's your fate but if your father-in-law is a poor man, it's your stupidity - Annon 

Imagination is more important than knowledge - Albert Einstein

In this world man must either be anvil or hammer - Henry W. Longfellow

It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness - Chinese Proverb

It takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to like someone and a day to love
someone but it takes a lifetime to forget someone - Unknown

Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a really hot curry ... What you do today might burn your backside tomorrow - Unknown

Life's a voyage that's homeward bound - Herman Melville

Live as if there were no tomorrow. Learn as if you live tomorrow - Gandhi

Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass
and it goes to pieces - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Money is not everything. Theres Mastercard and VISA - Annon

Murphy's Eighth Law: If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something

Murphy's Fifth Law: If anything absolutely can NOT go wrong, it will anyway

Murphy's First Law: Nothing is as easy as it looks

Murphy's Fourth Law: If there is a possibility that several things can go wrong, then the one
that will cause the greatest damage will be the one to go wrong

Murphy's Ninth Law: Nature always sides with the hidden flaw

Murphy's Second Law: Everything takes longer than you think

Murphy's Seventh Law: Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse

Murphy's Sixth Law: If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can
go wrong and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly

Murphy's Third Law: In any field of endeavor, anything that can go wrong will go wrong

My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it - Buddy Hackett

Never give up on a person you can't go a day without thimking about - Annon

Never put off the work till tomorrow what can be put off today - Annon

Never say more than is necessary - Richard Brinsley Sheridan

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent - Eleanor Roosevelt

Nothing can bring you peace but yourself - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Obstacles can't stop you. Problems can't stop you. Most of all, other people can't stop you. Only you can stop you - Jeffrey Gitomer

Often we have no time for our friends but all the time in the world for our enemies - Leon Uris

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are
committed by people who know the victim - George Carlin

One should love animals - they are so tasty - Annon

Plant a seed of friendship; reap a bouquet of happiness - Lois Kaufman Quotes

Practice makes perfect but nobody's perfect... so why practice? - Annon

Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak - Annon

Slumber not in the tents of your fathers! The world is advancing. Advance with it! - Mazzini

Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives - Annon

Take a chance because you never know how perfect something might turn out to be - Annon

That which does not kill you makes you stronger - Neitzsche

The best way to prepare for life is to begin to live - Elbert Hubbard

The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up and does not stop until you get to the office - Robert Frost

The first and greatest commandment is, Don't let them scare you - Elmer Davis

The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left - Jerry M. Wright

The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none - Thomas Carlyle

The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart - Jaime H. Young

The only way to have a friend is to be one - Source Unknown

The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain the second time around - Herb Caen

The wise never marry and when they do, they become otherwise - Annon

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics - Mark Twain

There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle, or to be the mirror that reflects it - Edith Wharton

There is time for everything - Thomas A. Edison

There should be a better way to start the day than waking up every morning - Annon

Three sentences for Success; "Know more than the other, work more than the other, expect less than the other" - Wiliam Shakespeare

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior" - Rita Rudner

Try not to become a man of success but a man of value - Albert Einstein

We do not inherit the earth from our parents, we borrow it from our children - Native American proverb

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture - Robin Williams

What you dislike in another take care to correct in yourself - Thomas Sprat

Where there is a will, I want to be in it - Annon

Win without boasting, lose without excuse - Albert Payson Terhune

Winning doesn't always mean being first. Winning means you're doing better than you've done before - Blair 

Winning isn't everything, but wanting to win is - Vince Lombardi

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you would rather have talked - Mark Twain

Work fascinates me. I can look at it for hours - Annon

You are your own worst enemy - Annon

You must be the change you wish to see in the world - Mahatma Ghandi

Your future depends on your dreams. So go to sleep - Annon